I'll Never Get To...

Tell my father I'm sorry and I was wrong.

Most of my life I thought my father was the meanest man alive, he was gone most of the time with his job and when he came home life was different, very different. When dad was gone, mom pretty much let us do anything, and quite frankly we did a lot of things we shouldn't have and I know that I am very lucky I made it through high school. I made some very bad choices and did some very stupid things.When dad came home he was very strict, we couldn't go anywhere, do anything. I pretty much couldn't stand him once I became a teenager.

Now as the mother of a boy getting ready to hit the teen years, I get it, I totally get it. I am so scared for Ryan that he will make bad choices and get into trouble. I know the things I did and it scares me he might do some of the same. My brothers tease me that I am very overprotective but I couldn't live with myself if anything ever happened to him. I just wonder if this was why my dad behaved as he did. He had some wild teen years from the stories I heard and he had a brother that died at a very young age because of these types of activities so I just wonder now if he was trying to protect us from the bad. Yes, he could have done a few things differently, but no one is a perfect parent, and I now think he only had the best of intentions.

I'm Back

okay, I didn't really go anywhere but it was a pretty busy week so I didn't get a chance to post on here at all. On Monday I subbed @ preschool and it was Ashlyn's birthday so I spent the afternoon in her classroom. Then Ryan had soccer after school. tue, wed & thurs. I worked so that meant I slept all day and friday I subbed 4th grade at the elementary school. That was really alot of fun, the class was really good for the most part and I had a great time, I wasn't too sure how it would go since I have never subbed for any grade higher than 1st but i really enjoyed myself. Yesterday was the usual dance class and soccer game. A really cool thing that happened was I talked to one of my Scraptown friends (Marianne) on the phone. It was so cool to actually put a voice with the name and it was really like talking to an old friend :)

So that was my week, hopefully this week won't be so crazy, I really can't wait till school is out and dance & soccer are over so the kids and I can just hang out and do as we please :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASHLYN!!

6 years ago.... I could never have imagined what a wonderful little person you would be. You are smart and funny and beautiful. You have such a wonderful sense of humor and you definately make each day in our house more special. Your smile brightens my world and your laughter fills my heart. I love you Ashlyn Ava. Happy 6th Birthday!!

Ashlyn's Birthday Party

just a few pics from Ashlyn's party at the fun factory. It was a lot of fun and I think everyone had a great time. I didn't get as many pics as I'd have liked to but it's hard when they don't ever come out of the bouncy maze :)

Twinsicles

my sister Benda, Tyani & I went shopping after Ashlyn's birthday party on Saturday and we all got the same outfit in different colors. We look pretty dorky but couldn't resist taking a pic.

Ashlyn Funny

Ashlyn's birthday party is on Saturday so her friends have been calling to RSVP. Tonight a little girl from her class calls and the converstaion goes something like this:

Haleigh: My dad is going to carry me to your party.

Ashlyn: CARRY YOU, Really?

Haleigh: Yes, he said he will carry me to your party, so I can come.

Ashlyn: He's gonna CARRY YOU? all the way to my party? That's far.


At this point I have to interrupt Ashlyn and explain to her that some people say "carry" instead of "bring". Then the light bulb goes on, she finally understands this means that Haleigh is coming to her party and starts jumping up and down and squealing :) Gotta love little girls!!

I Finally Finished!!

I have been working on this project for weeks now. I am so excited that it's done. I forgot to take pictures before I started but it was my brothers dirty old bright red toolbox. It was really filthy and gross. I am so excited the way it turned out. The pink isn't really that bright and the flowers go all the way around. I am going to put this in my bedroom to help hold my scrapbook goodies. Can't wait to get it in the house and all organized!!! (If you click on the picture and enlarge it, you can see the flowers better :) )

One of Those Days

This was one of those days where everything just fell into place perfectly. These days don't happen often around here so I definately enjoy it when it does.

The kids are home for spring break this week so it is kind of hard for me to get sleep since I work nights. They tend to start fighting after about an hour. So today, my WONDERFUL friend came and picked them up and took them out for the day. So, I got to sleep, even shower and get the laundry and dishes done before they came home. They had such a great time and I was rested and happy which led to a fun afternoon for us. we played games and they helped make dinner and the kids even managed to play together without fighting most of the evening.

Just gotta love when days come together like this :)

Ryan's 1st Soccer Game

Ryan had his 1st soccer game of the season on Thursday. He was so excited, he hasn't played in the rec league for a couple years but decided to join again this year. At 1st the coach put him in goal, I'm not sure why since he has never played that position before and now they are old enough to use the regular size goal and Ryan is one of the shortest kids on the team. He did okay, saved quite a few but he did let in 4. 3 of which were way over his head and he had no chance of getting them. When the coach finally took him out he put him on the front line and he did awesome, i was so proud of him. they didn't win the score was 6-2 but they all tried really hard and played a great game.

Day of Rememberance

Every year on this day I take a good look at my life and I am always so thankful for everything I have. 17yrs ago today my one of my best friends, Donna died. She was 16 yrs old and had cancer. Donna, Stacey and I were inseperable. Life was very hard for a long time without her. She was the 1st person who was important in my life that died and I did not deal with it well. She was a very good influence on me but after her death I made some very questionable choices. I still miss her terribly and wonder what my life would be like if she were still here. Luckily everything has turned out well and now I have a great life and a wonderful family. But today my thoughts are with Donna and what might have been.